Fingers crossed for tomorrow...

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Ryan has a good day at school tomorrow. I'll consider any day that he doesn't get a red card as good!!

He has been in kindergarten for all of a week and a half. Their first three days were practice days, as far as behavior is concerned. The next full week he had two green cards (no problems), one yellow card (a couple of problems) and TWO red cards (too many problems). And his teacher really is pretty lenient. I've had a lot of comments about this from people who think it's pretty bad that a teacher is either using this system so early, or using it at all. But I honestly don't have a problem with it, I don' t think she mis-uses it like some teachers I've heard about. It has definitely let me know that Ryan is having difficulties with his behavior. That's really not a surprise at all, I just didn't expect it this early or to this extent. His first red card was because he deliberately pushed a child down on the floor so hard that he almost flipped over. And then he punched the same child in the stomach on the playground. Ryan said that the other child kept trying to hug him but I don't know if it was an affectionate hug or a wrestling-type-bear-hug. Either way it's not something she could just let go. His second red card was for several things, including constantly getting up out of his seat and literally running around the room and disturbing the other kids. She said they get several warnings each time before she pulls a card unless it's physical aggression.

The bottom line is that we are pretty sure Ryan has some mild sensory problems that are making him agitated and unable to sit still at school. It's different than ADD, although it may end up that he has ADD and not a form of SID. He has so many little sensory type problems. We can't take him to movies, because the combination of darkness, sound and close-quarters makes him terrified. Terrified, as in sobbing with his head on my lap, asking me over and over again if we can please PLEASE leave, too scared to get up and run out by himself (not that I would want him to). And this is soooo not the way he is with anything else. He always seems to need to push people, run into them as he passes by, reach out and touch (or shove or punch). When he gets upset it immediately turns into physical aggression, no matter the upset. Sunshine and water on his face make it hard for him to want to open his eyes. Often when he eats he stuffs his mouth full to the point of almost choking (although this has gotten lots better recently). Each of these things by itself is not really that abnormal, but all of them together in one child can be indicative of sensory disorder...definitely on the mild side though. So I researched and called a pediatric occupational therapy office and we'll have him evaluated in a week. Then we'll know for sure. If it is a sensory disorder, they will help us with physiological methods of helping "desensitize" him. And we're also seeing a wonderful child psychologist so that we can go at it from the cognitive angle as well.

I did ask Ryan how he felt about school this weekend, and he said he loves it! So he's not discouraged yet with the red cards. We've talked and talked about it this long weekend, and I'm hoping he'll have some strength to reel himself in a bit. We can hope anyway!